Sometimes, Jesus does not leave us much wiggle room for interpretation. In Matthew 18:15-20, Jesus speaks to the contentious of the faith, in first-century Palestine, in just about any century that followed, and certainly today. Church, if one wrongs you, then speak directly to them alone, if you are unable to reconcile, then bring one or two with you as witnesses, and if there continues to be no reconciliation, then bring it before the entire body of faith community. If the offender refuses to reconcile, then consider him or her outside the body. Only remember how Jesus treated the Gentile and tax-collectors!

I think John Wesley knocks this one out of the ball park in his sermon “The Cure of Evil-Speaking“:

“Avoid everything in look, gesture, word, and tone of voice, that savors of pride or self-sufficiency. Studiously avoid everything magisterial or dogmatical, everything that looks like arrogance or assuming. Beware of the most distant approach to disdain, overbearing, or contempt. With equal care avoid all appearance of anger; and though you use great plainness of speech, yet let there be no reproach, no railing accusation, no token of any warmth but that of love. Above all, let there be no shadow of hate or ill-will, no bitterness or sourness of expression; but use the air and language of sweetness, as well as gentleness, that all may appear to flow from love in the heart. And yet this sweetness need not hinder your speaking in the most serious and solemn manner; as far as may be, in the very words of the oracles of God (for there are none like them,) and as under the eye of Him who is coming to judge the quick and dead.”